The tragedy of having more money than you can spend

People, the suffering has gone on too long. No more should our celebrities have to deal with the horror of having far too much money.

They have run out of ways to spend it. Tons of time, energy, initiative, Swarovski crystals and other valuable resources are being used up trying to come up with the latest ridiculous, meaningless bling to ensure that our sad, pitiable celebrities don't have to face overloading their bank accounts. It's heartbreaking, these tumour-like bank accounts, infinitely growing.

They have to live all isolated in gated communities and private islands and have really ugly pets, just to try to decrease their out of control bank accounts. I mean, how can you look into their big vacuous puppy dog eyes without wanting to rescue them from the plight of having far more money than they can ever hope to spend. Won't somebody pleeeez think of the celebrities?

I weep for them